“The weekend changed my life and made me realize that my mother wasn’t being mean and selfish, she had a very serious illness.” Rachelle’s mother Cheryl, 52 worked at the local casino. Where she was once a full-time homemaker, Cheryl was now divorced and trying hard to make her way in the world. She made good money and spent it wisely. She wasn’t a gambler.

At least she wasn’t until two years ago. Rachelle, 33, and her mother were always best of friends. They talked or saw each other every day. They shared everything - like girlfriends, which made it difficult for Rachelle to understand why Cheryl suddenly stopped calling or coming around to visit. “She was going to the Raceway Slots and at first I thought it was okay. It was somewhere she could go alone,” said Rachelle. “She had friends but they were married and had children.” Soon Cheryl stopped seeing Rachelle and her sister, had abandoned her friends and last July, began borrowing money from Rachelle. “I was shocked because she is very independent, she made good money and never asked for anything. She wanted money to pay the rent and then asked for another month’s rent, so by this time she had borrowed $1,500 from me, a single mother trying to make ends meet,” said Rachelle.

After realizing the seriousness of her mother’s addiction, Rachelle suggested that Cheryl move in with her and her new boyfriend on the condition that she stop gambling. Cheryl had already gone through all her savings but still couldn’t stay away from her addiction.. “I ended up kicking her out, something I promised myself I would never do to my mother or my child,” said Rachelle. “It was a very cold act but I couldn’t take the rejection and tension that was affecting my new family and relationship. She hated me for kicking her out and didn’t talk to me for months. It was certainly the hardest thing I have ever had to do, but I couldn’t take the emotional part anymore,” Rachelle said.

Only a couple of weeks later, Cheryl sought help at the Problem Gambling Services. She subsequently asked Rachelle if she would be willing to take part in the family weekend workshop. At first Rachelle agreed because it was her mother, but once there she and her sister had their eyes opened in a most significant way.

“It was actually a big weight off my shoulders because I no longer wanted to accuse her of being selfish, inconsiderate and making everything all about her,” said Rachelle. “We know she had a very hard life and after the workshop we realized that what she went through probably caused her to gamble, and that it is her problem, not mine, but I’m here to support her.”

Rachelle says the weekend program for families not only outlines the stages her mother went through, but also the stages family members and loved ones go through and she could finally understand her own feelings. She never imagined being able to stand up and tell her story to perfect strangers, but Rachelle says the group was great because she could open up and tell her mother what she feels. This is safe ground and reassures people like Rachelle they are not alone. “At first I thought I’d lost my mind but now I understand it’s an illness and I don’t blame her,” Rachelle said. Rachelle and her mother are working on their damaged relationship and she’s excited for her mother’s success -beginning to live a life free from gambling.

“I hope if someone reads this and sees themselves that they will call Problem Gambling Service’s for help.” “The people in the group touched me more than anything I’ve ever done before,” said Rachelle. “Without help, this addiction will suck the life right out of you.”