It all came to a head in July 2004 when on a Thursday morning my wife Ellie heard on the radio that criminal charges had been laid against me. I had not had the courage to tell her myself. She was devastated and said she could not trust me (I didn’t know why) and that I would have to leave because she could not live in a marriage of lies and not being able to trust me. Feeling hurt, ashamed and alone I did what most compulsive gamblers would do, I gambled. I went to the races in Sarnia on Thursday, Elora on Friday, Sarnia on Saturday, Dresden on Sunday afternoon and to Windsor on Sunday night. I also gambled at the track casinos between racecards. I slept in my car each of these nights to save my money to bet with..

“I had lost quite a bit of money and realized I could not continue this way. There was a phone number in the race program for problem gamblers to call for help.”

I moved into an apartment about a week after Ellie and I separated. I continued gambling until December 2004. That Sunday was my last night gambling at the races and the casino. I had lost quite a bit of money and realized I could not continue this way. There was a phone number in the race program for problem gamblers to call for help. I took the program home with me. First thing Monday morning I called the number for Problem Gambling Services. I was very nervous making the call but I finally realized after forty years that my gambling was a major problem and I needed help to control it and in helping myself, I could maybe save my marriage. I was given an appointment with a counsellor named Charlie.

Charlie immediately made me feel very comfortable and secure. I felt that I could tell him everything and that he would never judge me. I told him everything about myself and answered all his questions openly and honestly. I felt that I would be able to be helped by Charlie. A previous attempt at counselling elsewhere several years prior had not been successful. Charlie asked me about my goals. I had three goals that I was determined to achieve and that was to stop gambling, get my wife back and to be able to lead a normal life. Charlie recommended that I attend as many Gamblers Anonymous meetings as possible as well as:
1) attend Ante-up meetings at Problem Gambling Services until the next 12 week treatment group;
2) attend a 12 week treatment group at Problem Gambling Services,
3) see my counsellor once a week and 4) attend a 12 week aftercare program.

I followed Charlie’s advice wholeheartedly. There was only one Ante-up meeting before the first meeting of my 12 week treatment group. I attended it along with several other people, some of whom were gamblers and others were family members of gamblers. This is where I met Louise, another counsellor at Problem Gambling Services. This meeting was a group discussion where each person discussed (shared) how gambling had affected their lives. I told my whole story again and answered several questions from Louise and other group members. The feeling of being able to share my experiences and feelings with other people who had similar stories and problems was a great relief to me and made me realize I was not alone.

The 12 week treatment group began the next week with Louise running it. As with Charlie, I felt very comfortable with Louise and knew that she would not be judgmental and that I could be open and honest with her. This was a very emotional meeting for me and I struggled for composure while I was sharing. Although Louise assured everyone that showing our emotions was a positive thing to do I did not feel it at the time since I had never been one to express my feelings. We kept a daily gambling log to record our feelings and situations where we had urges to gamble. We completed a Gambling Craving Scale weekly, which would show our improvement. These meetings made me take a long, hard look at myself and I did not like the old Larry. They helped me tremendously in preventing urges to gamble, in expressing my feelings and in achieving my goals. I completed the 12 week program and did not gamble. I am now in my 8th week of the 12 week aftercare program. Pat has been the counsellor helping us in these meetings and once again I feel comfortable and at ease and able to express my thoughts and feelings freely. I feel this program is very important in my continued success at beating my gambling addiction.

During these 5 months of attending these group meetings, I have continued to meet with Charlie for individual counselling and have regularly attended 4 Gamblers Anonymous meetings per week.

During our separation, Ellie and I maintained our friendship of 30 years. When I told her I had finally admitted to being a compulsive gambler and was getting help, she was relieved and happy. After a while, she saw enough change in me to believe I was serious about stopping gambling. She said I could "court her" to see if we could work things out. After several months of dating we reconciled and have been back together since April 1st. Because of Problem Gambling Services and Gamblers Anonymous meetings, I have not gambled in 5 months. I feel I have become a better person and with their help I am achieving all of my goals. My marriage is the best it has ever been because Ellie and I are now able to discuss our feelings and problems and anything else openly and honestly. I am slowly but surely regaining her trust in me. I am forever grateful to Problem Gambling Services and everyone there.

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